ride the climate rollercoaster

Carbonlite and I are climbing steeply. We push ever higher and suddenly the whole of Coney Island bay stretches before us. But no time for admiring the view as we hurtle over the edge and shoot back to earth, screaming and waving our hands in the air along with 50 other riders.
The rollercoaster we’re all on is the usual mix of anticipation and terror. But this is no ordinary ride. With the help of a screen, a short film, a dose of audience participation and some facts from our host, we are riding the Climate Change Rollercoaster.
“London’s underwater and two thirds of the world’s glaciers have gone,” he shouts as we plunge downhill, screaming. “Oh crikey moses the whole climate system has gone into reverse,” he bellows, as we wave out hands wildly in the air.

I glance at Carbonlite and he catches my eye. Just for a change I’m responsible for organising our latest eco outing; to a climate change stand up comedy night at our local theatre. Our entertainment is provided by the Carbon Detox writer and climate change campaigner George Marshall, who runs an environmental charity and teaches others to lecture about the world’s problems. But tonight he tackles the issue through humour; highlighting our denial strategies, pointing out the eco stereotypes, myths and contradictions, and making us laugh at an issue that others portray as dry, boring, or downright scary.

We disembark the rollercoaster and our comedy coach continues with an education about evil carbon twins.
“Last year I dropped in on my neighbour to settle some minor boundary dispute,” George tells us. “There was a walloping four-wheel-drive tank in the drive, his house was as hot as a sauna with the back door open; every room was lit up like an operating theatre by halogen spots and a 1.8 metre plasma screen TV was going full throttle in the corner. As soon as I saw his house I realized all the energy that my own energy efficient house and low impact living was saving was being used up by him.”
He pauses for a moment before throwing his hands in the air in despair. “I might just have well have run cable between our houses and sent all the energy that I was saving over there.”

On the way home Carbonlite and I discuss our evil carbon twins and who they could be.
“Well it isn’t our next door neighbours,” I say. “One heats their whole house with just a single real fire; I’ve seen her out collecting fuel. And the other goes on the Wheely Good Communities trolley dash to get her shopping.” But I admit it could be some of my friends, many of whom still fly for fun and breed 4x4’s faster than they produce children. And as for my mother, currently and always ‘off on a cruise,’ well she sucks out more energy savings than a family of sextuplets. I’m thinking all of this out loud when Carbonlite interrupts.
“Don’t you get it? You’re my evil carbon twin,” he says, “I go biking to make more space on the road for your tin box. I wear an extra jumper all day and you blow our carbon rations on heating the house at night. I replace all the lightbulbs and you….”
“Hey ok, ok.” I say, my hands up in the air. “I might be your evil carbon twin but we’re stuck on this climate change rollercoaster together. So you’d better hold on tight to me and we can ride the cyclone. Let’s face it baby, I could be the only thing between you and the abyss.”